This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time.

“Have your adventures, make your mistakes, and choose your friends poorly -- all these make for great stories.” 
― Chuck Palahniuk

Miami where I'll be staying for a week I hope!

It’s been months since I’ve written anything and I’ve been asked to write about my trip, so here goes! 

This month, I'll be trying to hit Chicago, Madison, Milwaukee, Atlanta, Charleston, Savannah, Hilton Head island, Miami, Key West, St Petersburg/Tampa, New Orleans, Houston, Austin, Roswell, Grand Canyon, St George, Los Angeles, and finally San Diego...if I make it out of Miami or New Orleans alive!  Hahaha!  

  It wasn’t easy for me to accept that I’ve been living in Cincinnati for years past what was healthy for me.  It seems at times I was living a lie, and I didn’t know how to escape.  I know that I don’t belong there, and I know that I’ll never find someone to date long term there.  While I have meet many, many awesome people that have helped shape my life, I just don’t belong.  According the city, I am a strange mother fucker!  I’m one of the few single 30+ year old child free people.  Then put on top of that that I’m a liberal atheist too, and I’m all sorts of fucked!   I grew up in Wisconsin and went to one of the most diverse and progressive public universities in the country, UW-Madison.  Men’s health magazine had it as the top healthiest place for young males.   I went back there last week and it reminded me how much I miss those people.  I might sound like a dick, but I can’t date someone that’s not keeping themselves in shape by either diet or exercise and it seems like Cincinnati is the opposite of that.  At most, I lost 70 fucking pounds, and I’ve seen that doing that is contagious.  Other friends got strength from seeing I could do it, so they lost 50, 100, or even 125 pounds, which I am very proud of them for. 

“It’s only after we’ve lost everything that we’re free to do anything”

My possible destinations from northern most WI, to FL, and East GA to West CA!

After my Europe trip and the ease with which I made friends everywhere I went and learned that I could be happy elsewhere on a coast where most people are transplants.  My favorite Mark Twain quote is "When the end of the world comes, I want to be in Cincinnati because it's always twenty years behind the times."  And my favorite quote from a person who’s never left this place is “Yes, we’re in a rut, but we like it!”…that is what I need to get away from.  Negativity or simply stagnation in your life, just not doing anything to move forward, is contagious.  For me, since I grew up in the not so religious northern US and especially since I’ve been exposed to big cities like Chicago, I know that there is better out there for me.  I just didn’t know that I could make friends and find a job elsewhere, so I stayed here in Cincy…at the peak of my life…and in a rut.  Hell, I lived in the best, most expensive area in Mt Adams, but at the end of the day it’s not enough.  When I look into downtown from up the hill, at 5 pm the downtown completely fucking empties.  Not a soul to be found and all restaurants close.  This place is a suburban paradise, but I’m a urban center/ public transportation person.  After Europe and not driving for 6 weeks, I fucking hate having to drive so much!  Also, since everyone is in a suburb, they never leave them to explore the world because everything is so far away.  Very few people even know that Over the Rhine fucking doesn’t have race riots anymore!  Everyone has had their same friends since high school or elementary school and has bought a house next to their parents’ house and next to their grandparents house too.  I’ll be honest with you, in 5.5 years I have lived in 8 places around town to see what area I liked…and I still don’t like any so much that I’d buy a home.  I’ve been finding one reason or another to stay here, like a relationship and then grad school or thinking that since it was so hard to live in Cincinnati, the rest of the world must be difficult too, because I hadn’t been exposed to another country.  This city is one of a kind, it’s great in some ways, but most people don’t escape.  There are mostly older people here as well, which makes it hard to find single, young ladies.  And so the attractive ladies have so many guys hit on them, they think their shit smells like roses, because that’s what they’re told even if they only half hot.  It sucks!   It also makes Cincincinnati the most sexually repressed cities I’ve ever been to in the Northern US.  I’ve heard a lot of horror stories during my 100 dates in 2.5 years. 

 One of the most important things that happened in Europe was finding out about was couchsurfing.org .  Couchsurfing is a way to social network like on facebook, but while having a profile that talks about you as a person like a dating website.  You put your couch up to anyone coming into your city, and at the same time you can search any city you want and find someone to host you.  It has the advantage over a hotel of you actually getting to meet a local from the area and learn about their culture and lifestyle.  This site has given me so much independence to travel anywhere around the world.  I don’t know about you, but I love not having to pay for shit!  I used it to find cool people in Cincinnati to hang out with as well who are curious about the world.  When I went to California, I didn’t pay a dime in San Francisco, Los Angeles, San Diego, or Tijuana.  In turn I’ve hosted a guy from LA and one from Beijing. 

My trip to California wasn’t a random trip.  I knew what I was looking for, a city that lands in the best  cities for young people to travel to list, it has a beach, lots of sun, intelligent and open minded young people, jobs, affordable housing, people who stay active year round.  I want to see non-religious, sexually free young people who are in shape and have tattoos and facial piercings.  I want to feel the sand beneath my feet like I did in Europe.  Moving to Europe is on my to do list, but I need to learn a second language first and California gives me that being on the border of Mexico.   When I went to San Francisco I wasn’t expecting to love it as much as I did.  It’s a town full of transplants, has great public transportation, great fresh foods, and is on the water.  The down side is it rained almost every day and the beach was freezing cold.  After that I hit LA’s Long Beach area in the winter and the weather was nice but LA is LA after all and it’s not healthy to live there.  My third city was SD and for me, after my Goldilocks tasting the three bowls of porridge,   my third city was just hot enough and friendly and clean and perfect!   SD is 68 degrees and sunny on my birthday, New Year’s Eve in winter and it never hits 100, so it’s fucking perfect.  It’s in the top 2 or 3 cities for young people to live.  Also, did I mention it doesn’t have hurricanes like the East coast?  Yup, just perfect sunny days! 

So what the hell am I doing then you ask?  I have no fucking idea is the honest truth.  Over the past 2 months I’ve been working a job I HATE almost 7 days a week to make overtime moving money.  This week, I have quit the highest paying job I’ll get in Cincy and 2 months ago left my amazing apartment in the best area of Cincy, Mt Adams.  In January, I dropped out of grad school halfway through, and have no replacement school yet.  I am selling all of my shit and packing up my car with no job and no place to live.  I am truly homeless as of next week and it’s scary as shit, and exciting as hell all at the same time!  I know that after going to Europe for 6 weeks, I didn’t miss my stuff, my possessions.  I enjoyed making new connections, I NEED that in my life.  Also, I’ve found out that I can get a job anywhere in the world, which means I would need at least 1 second language.  I have taught myself over the past few years how to make connections anywhere I go and have them remember me.  I can afford any city in the US, so why the fuck not be a gypsy for a while and learn about the world and about myself and what I’m capable completely alone.   I’m setting up couchsurfers to stay with and OK Cupid “dates” along the way to find out where I belong.  After this trip, I’ll have connections in most major cities in the US. 

Right now I have nowhere to call my home, but an infinite amount of places to lay my head without fear of what comes tomorrow.  I don’t know what the best job I’m capable of getting, or the best city I’m capable of living in, or the coolest chick I’m able to meet, but I’m finally ready to spread my wings!  ;)